When I was at the gym this morning, I was thinking about all of the reasons that I go. I know that some people work out with a gym partner, but for me being at the gym is time that I get to be with myself and my thoughts. If I'm not running, I spend the time on the elliptical or the bike reading a good book or one of my most recent fitness magazines. Going to the gym turns a bad day into a good one for me. Sometimes I feel as though I am releasing bad energy and letting in the good. Although, having the motivitation isn't always the easiest - being healthy is a way of life.
I don't think that I am the picture of perfect health, but I have had several people ask me for advice. One of the most recent questions is "What diet did you go on?" or "Were there any pills that you used?"
The answers to these two questions are: I eat clean and no way. I take a multivitamin every day. That is it. I know that some people who lift weights take pills, but hopefully it is under the supervision of a certified trainer who knows what is safe and what isn't. The eating regimen that I was on for the competition was crazy strict, but it was clean. 'Diets' in general are poop. Some diets can be a good jump start for your metabolism if you are planning on maintaining a healthy lifestyle to follow, but starving yourself and then eating pizza and beer are not the answers. Healthy eating is a way of life, not a temporary fix. 80% of what your body looks like comes from what you put into your mouth, not how much time you spend on the treadmill.
The most important part is, I work out and eat healthy for me. No one else. It has to be for you, or it just won't stick. Fitting into a smaller size is just an added bonus! Being healthy and losing weight can't start when you walk into the gym doors and end when you leave. It is a lifestyle.
None of us are perfect, in fact there were times prior to becoming vegan that I had to ask Chris to put the Nutella in his locked safe so I wouldn't eat the entire jar....again. If you can't make it to the gym, go for a long walk. Don't beat yourself up for having a cookie, but just don't eat the whole jar.
Saturday, November 26, 2011
Friday, November 25, 2011
Our Turkey-less Thanksgiving
Needless to say, my Thanksgiving was turkey-less. We did not eat To-Furkey because….well….To-Furkey? That sounds frickin nasty. I love tofu in lots of things, but it is turkey or no turkey for me. I LOVE thanksgiving! So….here are the recipes for the yummies that we ate.
Thanksgiving Lentil Casserole
(I found this one on vebweb.com, I highly suggest making a gravy with it because it is good by itself but gravy gave it some extra phizazz J)
2 cups brown rice (I used lentils)
½ cup cashews or walnuts chopped (I used ¼ cup of each)
2 slices of whole wheat bread chopped into small cubes
1 cup of vegetable broth
½ cup of soy milk (I used almond milk)
2 tbsp nutritional yeast (I used 3 tbsp)
1 rib celery, diced (I used 3 ribs)
1 small onion, finely chopped
3 tbsp olive oil
Herbs to taste: sage, majoram, thyme, pepper, rosemary (I used about a tsp of each)
Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Spray a 8 or 9 inch casserole dish with cooking spray
While rice (lentils) are cooking, sauté the celery and onion in the olive oil. Mix all of the ingredients in a large bowl. Spread into a casserole dish and bake for 45 minutes. That’s it! Super easy!
Golden Mushroom Gravy
This was frickin’ amazing! YUMMMMMMMM! I got this one out of my ‘1000 Vegan Recipes’ cookbook by Robin Robertson
1 tbsp olive oil
½ cup chopped onion
1 cup cooked or canned chickpeas, drained and rinsed
1 ½ cups vegetable broth (I ended up using about 2 cups)
1 ½ cups sliced white mushrooms
1 tsp thyme
1 tsp savory
1 tsp sage
Salt and pepper
Heat oil on medium heat in a medium saucepan. Add the onion, cover and cook until softened. Add the chickpeas and ½ cup of veggie broth. Stir until all ingredients are softened
Take chickpea/onion mixture and put into blender or food processor. Blend until smooth. Set aside. In the same saucepan, combine the remaining veggie broth and mushrooms and bring to a boil.
Reduce heat to low and add the chickpea mixture to the mushroom and veggie broth. Add all of the spices and stir. You can serve this right away or store it overnight. I made this the night before and when I reheated it, I had to add more broth. I served it over the Lentil Casserole.
Ginger Mashed Sweet Potatoes and Apples
What the yum?! I got this one out of my ‘Appetite for Reduction’ cookbook. Her recipes are also at the Post Punk Kitchen blog that I follow. This was SOOOO simple and yummy!
1 lb apples (about 2 average sized apples. I used fuji) cut into chunks
2 lb sweet potatoes or yams cut into ½ inch chunks
*the recipe says to peel the apples and potatoes, but I LOVE the skins so I left them on
¼ cup water
¼ tsp salt
1 tbsp agave nectar
¼ tsp ground cinnamon
½ tsp ginger
Bring water and salt to a boil. Add the apples and potatoes. Cover and reduce heat to low. Stir often. Slowly let them steam so they don’t burn. Steam for about 20 minutes until they are soft and tender. Drain. Mash with a potato masher. Add the rest of the ingredients and mix well. Serve. YUM!
The Salad
Literally, this was nothing special. I just mixed dried cherries, spinach, cucumber and tomatoes. The best part was the dressing. I used Walden Farms Balsamic Vinaigarette…..um what…no calories. None. All natural. Check out Walden Farms website. Some of their stuff frickin rocks!
Vegan Walnut Brownies
Ok, so these are NOT necessarily good for you. I tweaked the recipe a bit, though…sooo they are better than they are supposed to be. I will give you the regular recipe and I will put in the changes I made.
2 cups flour
2 cups sugar (I used 1 cup of sugar and ½ cup of stevia)
¾ cup of cocoa
1 tsp baking powder
1 tsp salt
1 cup water (I used 1 ½ cup water)
1 cup oil (I used ½ cup of oil)
1 tsp vanilla extract
1 cup chopped walnuts
Preheat oven to 350 degrees
Mix up all of the ingredients and spread into a greased, square pan. Bake for 25 to 30 minutes (*because of the changes I made, I had to increase the baking time to 40 minutes).
Wednesday, November 23, 2011
Thankfulness....
So, I know it is not Thanksgiving yet. It is Thanksgiving Eve. I was trying to figure out what to write about and then I realized that tomorrow is meant to be a day of reflection (and the anniversary of pilgrims taking over Native American land....but let's not focus on that.....I wonder if Thanksgiving ever makes Native Americans angry????).....back to being thankful.
So, today I am going to write a list of the things that I am truly thankful for:
1. My dad. I love him more than words. I love everything about him. He embodies kindness. He is the most giving person I will ever know and loves everyone he knows for who they are. He helped me become vegan and for that I am thankful.
2. My health.
4. Iggy. I literally want to eat my nephew.
5. Chrissy.....yep that hunk o' man before you is all mine.
6. Pogo....yes even the practically incontinent dog
7. My friends and family. Too many to name.
8. The great outdoors....they have given me serenity many times....so perhaps I should thank the Indians???
9. My eyesight....as crap as it is.
10. Carbs....I love you!
This is hard.....there are so many things and so many people that I am thankful for in my life. I will spend the rest of the night preparing for my vegan thanksgiving and thinking about all the people that I am so very thankful for. Happy Thanksgiving everyone!
So, today I am going to write a list of the things that I am truly thankful for:
1. My dad. I love him more than words. I love everything about him. He embodies kindness. He is the most giving person I will ever know and loves everyone he knows for who they are. He helped me become vegan and for that I am thankful.
2. My health.
4. Iggy. I literally want to eat my nephew.
5. Chrissy.....yep that hunk o' man before you is all mine.
6. Pogo....yes even the practically incontinent dog
7. My friends and family. Too many to name.
8. The great outdoors....they have given me serenity many times....so perhaps I should thank the Indians???
9. My eyesight....as crap as it is.
10. Carbs....I love you!
This is hard.....there are so many things and so many people that I am thankful for in my life. I will spend the rest of the night preparing for my vegan thanksgiving and thinking about all the people that I am so very thankful for. Happy Thanksgiving everyone!
Sunday, November 20, 2011
What DO you eat????
So, I run into this question just about every other day. Along with "Where do you get your protein?" and "Where do you get your calcium?" and "What about essential fatty acids?"
Unfortunately, our society has been led to believe that we NEED meat. We NEED milk. We NEED eggs. Truthfully, we do not. Let me start with the milk thing. Humans are the only living species that drink milk from another animal....think about it? Gross. When a human mom begins to lactate, she does so until the baby is weened off of breast milk. Cows are the same. However, in our society, we hook these cows up to machines for the rest of their lives sucking milk out of them constantly so they are continually lactating. Sound morbid? It is. Let's take that one step further. So these cows are hooked up to a machine that is constantly sucking at it's udders. Overtime the udders become infected and the pus that forms is mixed into the milk that is sucked out...and we drink it. Yum! Under normal conditions, a cow produces about 10 gallons of milk a day. Under USDA approved farms, a single cow is made to produce over 100 gallons a day by injecting cows with hormones. Still sound yummy? If you are a meaty, no problem. Just please please please buy organic. So, where do I get my calcium? Easy. Here is a list of delicious foods that calcium lives in besides the overly advertised cow milk.
Fortified grains, kale, collard greens, mustard greens, cabbage, kelp, seaweed, watercress, chickpeas, broccoli, red beans, soy beans (soy milk!), tofu, spinach, tomatoes, seeds and raw nuts. Pretty much anything green. There are also calcium fortified rice milks and juices. In fact, one serving of cooked collard greens has a higher calcium content than an 8 oz glass of milk.....interesting.
Alright. Meat. We are taught by many that meat is ever so important. White meat is told to be one of the purest forms of protein...and it is. Animal protein. Red meat also has protein, but it is also filled with all of the fantastic crap that fills our arteries and makes us have hypertension (known in the health industry as The Silent Killer), heart attacks and open heart surgeries. Recent studies have shown links to animal proteins that increase the risk of certain cancers. Feel free to read The China Study or Forks or Knives...or read this link: http://www.cancerproject.org/survival/cancer_facts/meat.php
So, if you believe any of this stuff then that means if you eat lots of meat you will get cancer....but of course that is as long as your heart doesn't kill you first. Last night I saw a comic who made a funny joke about dating a vegan with a "tofu dick" (aka limp dick) because he didn't eat meat. Although this is hilarious, it isn't true. Cardiovascular disease is one of the leading causes of erectile dysfunction. Think about it. There are no bones in it, just blood. If the blood can't get to it, then no boner for you. When I worked at the Senior Clinic, whenever a patient complained of E.D. the first thing the doc did was check his cholesterol. True story.....
Anyway, once again. I don't give a shit if you eat meat, but stick to the healthy stuff which isn't fast food and it sure as hell isn't bleeding. A bloody steak tastes fantastic, but in moderation. So, where do I get my protein?
Quinoa and other whole grains (quinoa has 18 grams of protein per serving!), beans, lentils, legumes (thank you indian food!), tofu, soy, nuts, seeds, nut butter, seitan and meat substitutes. Oh and my favorite. Vegan protein powder.
Essential fatty acids. Ok, so even when I was in nursing school I was taught that we get our essential fatty acids (the omegas) from fish. What do these things do? These essentials nutrients are needed for metabolism, but your body cannot create them so you HAVE to get them from food. They are omega-3 and omega-6. Turns out, fish isn't the only place and you don't have to take a shitload of vitamins either. Here is the list:
Omega-6: Veggies, fruits, nuts, grains, seeds.....yeah, seems too simple. It is just that simple. There are also some oils you can get it from (safflower, sunflower, corn, soya, evening primrose, pumpkin and wheatgerm)
Omega-3: Flaxseed, mustard seed, walnut oil, hemp seeds, GREEN LEAFY VEGGIES, grains and spirulina. The best part???? DARK CHOCOLATE!!!!!
Ok, so there are a lot of things I CAN eat. A ton. The issue is basically going out to eat. I have to look at the menu ahead of time. The most sure fire way for me to KNOW it is vegan is to buy and prepare it myself. Do I care if you eat meat? NO. I do not care at all. Eat in front of me, next to me. I don't care. I haven't felt this healthy in my entire life and it is fantastic. No steak could replace it. I have been virtually allergy symptom free with the exception of the eye incident, but last year I missed over 13 days of work due to allergies and migraines. This year, I have missed 2 and a half. These are my opinions and my decisions, but I think it is always important to remain open minded. I know we have had meat and milk drilled into our heads for years....but why not go against the system? These organizations are run by the government and they aren't always the most honest. I leave you with a quote.
“The doctor of the future will no longer treat the human frame with drugs, but rather will cure and prevent disease with nutrition.”~ Thomas Edison
Unfortunately, our society has been led to believe that we NEED meat. We NEED milk. We NEED eggs. Truthfully, we do not. Let me start with the milk thing. Humans are the only living species that drink milk from another animal....think about it? Gross. When a human mom begins to lactate, she does so until the baby is weened off of breast milk. Cows are the same. However, in our society, we hook these cows up to machines for the rest of their lives sucking milk out of them constantly so they are continually lactating. Sound morbid? It is. Let's take that one step further. So these cows are hooked up to a machine that is constantly sucking at it's udders. Overtime the udders become infected and the pus that forms is mixed into the milk that is sucked out...and we drink it. Yum! Under normal conditions, a cow produces about 10 gallons of milk a day. Under USDA approved farms, a single cow is made to produce over 100 gallons a day by injecting cows with hormones. Still sound yummy? If you are a meaty, no problem. Just please please please buy organic. So, where do I get my calcium? Easy. Here is a list of delicious foods that calcium lives in besides the overly advertised cow milk.
Fortified grains, kale, collard greens, mustard greens, cabbage, kelp, seaweed, watercress, chickpeas, broccoli, red beans, soy beans (soy milk!), tofu, spinach, tomatoes, seeds and raw nuts. Pretty much anything green. There are also calcium fortified rice milks and juices. In fact, one serving of cooked collard greens has a higher calcium content than an 8 oz glass of milk.....interesting.
Alright. Meat. We are taught by many that meat is ever so important. White meat is told to be one of the purest forms of protein...and it is. Animal protein. Red meat also has protein, but it is also filled with all of the fantastic crap that fills our arteries and makes us have hypertension (known in the health industry as The Silent Killer), heart attacks and open heart surgeries. Recent studies have shown links to animal proteins that increase the risk of certain cancers. Feel free to read The China Study or Forks or Knives...or read this link: http://www.cancerproject.org/survival/cancer_facts/meat.php
So, if you believe any of this stuff then that means if you eat lots of meat you will get cancer....but of course that is as long as your heart doesn't kill you first. Last night I saw a comic who made a funny joke about dating a vegan with a "tofu dick" (aka limp dick) because he didn't eat meat. Although this is hilarious, it isn't true. Cardiovascular disease is one of the leading causes of erectile dysfunction. Think about it. There are no bones in it, just blood. If the blood can't get to it, then no boner for you. When I worked at the Senior Clinic, whenever a patient complained of E.D. the first thing the doc did was check his cholesterol. True story.....
Anyway, once again. I don't give a shit if you eat meat, but stick to the healthy stuff which isn't fast food and it sure as hell isn't bleeding. A bloody steak tastes fantastic, but in moderation. So, where do I get my protein?
Quinoa and other whole grains (quinoa has 18 grams of protein per serving!), beans, lentils, legumes (thank you indian food!), tofu, soy, nuts, seeds, nut butter, seitan and meat substitutes. Oh and my favorite. Vegan protein powder.
Essential fatty acids. Ok, so even when I was in nursing school I was taught that we get our essential fatty acids (the omegas) from fish. What do these things do? These essentials nutrients are needed for metabolism, but your body cannot create them so you HAVE to get them from food. They are omega-3 and omega-6. Turns out, fish isn't the only place and you don't have to take a shitload of vitamins either. Here is the list:
Omega-6: Veggies, fruits, nuts, grains, seeds.....yeah, seems too simple. It is just that simple. There are also some oils you can get it from (safflower, sunflower, corn, soya, evening primrose, pumpkin and wheatgerm)
Omega-3: Flaxseed, mustard seed, walnut oil, hemp seeds, GREEN LEAFY VEGGIES, grains and spirulina. The best part???? DARK CHOCOLATE!!!!!
Ok, so there are a lot of things I CAN eat. A ton. The issue is basically going out to eat. I have to look at the menu ahead of time. The most sure fire way for me to KNOW it is vegan is to buy and prepare it myself. Do I care if you eat meat? NO. I do not care at all. Eat in front of me, next to me. I don't care. I haven't felt this healthy in my entire life and it is fantastic. No steak could replace it. I have been virtually allergy symptom free with the exception of the eye incident, but last year I missed over 13 days of work due to allergies and migraines. This year, I have missed 2 and a half. These are my opinions and my decisions, but I think it is always important to remain open minded. I know we have had meat and milk drilled into our heads for years....but why not go against the system? These organizations are run by the government and they aren't always the most honest. I leave you with a quote.
“The doctor of the future will no longer treat the human frame with drugs, but rather will cure and prevent disease with nutrition.”~ Thomas Edison
Wednesday, November 16, 2011
The Bucket List
When I started this blog I thought it was mainly because I wanted to hold myself accountable for health goals that I wanted to reach by my 30th birthday. 7 months have passed since said birthday and as I begin this journey into the "dirty thirties", I can't help but think that perhaps I am having some sort of a quaterly-life-crisis (that is of course assuming that I will live to be 120).
I have found myself reflecting a lot on my life, my choices and what I want to accomplish. To say that I regret anything would be a lie. I regret nothing. Everything that I have experienced has brought me to this point in my life and for that I am thankful. It is best to have no regrets. What happens, happens. Some say things happen for a reason, some say it is destiny, some say shit happens. Regardless, it has been my life's mission to live without regrets. Perhaps this is why I find myself in such a pickle today.
When I was having breakfast with my father a few Sundays ago, he mentioned how happy he is that I am "checking off my bucket list". I smiled and wondered "Is that what I'm doing?"
I think that I thought (wording?) that I would have accomplished more of the things on my list at this point in my life. I have come to the conclusion that when I started this blog, it was subconciously more than just a goal-setter. I was setting out a mission. Holding myself accountable to accomplish all of the things I want in life.
When I was 13, I thought that by the time I was 30 I would be "settled down".......
let me stop things right there. Who in the fuck came up with the phrase "settled down"? Seems to me it is a nice way of saying chained to a house, a spouse and kids. Not that I am saying those things are bad, but that is what it sounds like. Like when you "settle down" you buy your house, pump out some kidlets and wait to die.....but I digress.
Ok, so at 13 I thought I would be 'chained' to all of those things. White picket fence, the dog, the kids, the whole shit-in-a-bag. Happy, right? Turns out that isn't what I wanted. I got married. I got divorced. I bought a house. I sold the house. I got a dog. He shits in the house....hmmm......I took in a homeless Mexican dog, what can I say?
So now I am thinking perhaps I should start a bucket list. Don't get me wrong, I love kids....but I still don't know if that whole package is for me. I can barely remember to feed my dog each day and sometimes I think he is passive aggressive about it.....is that possible?
So, here it is. I will begin my bucket list. Here on this blog.....where to start?
I have found myself reflecting a lot on my life, my choices and what I want to accomplish. To say that I regret anything would be a lie. I regret nothing. Everything that I have experienced has brought me to this point in my life and for that I am thankful. It is best to have no regrets. What happens, happens. Some say things happen for a reason, some say it is destiny, some say shit happens. Regardless, it has been my life's mission to live without regrets. Perhaps this is why I find myself in such a pickle today.
When I was having breakfast with my father a few Sundays ago, he mentioned how happy he is that I am "checking off my bucket list". I smiled and wondered "Is that what I'm doing?"
I think that I thought (wording?) that I would have accomplished more of the things on my list at this point in my life. I have come to the conclusion that when I started this blog, it was subconciously more than just a goal-setter. I was setting out a mission. Holding myself accountable to accomplish all of the things I want in life.
When I was 13, I thought that by the time I was 30 I would be "settled down".......
let me stop things right there. Who in the fuck came up with the phrase "settled down"? Seems to me it is a nice way of saying chained to a house, a spouse and kids. Not that I am saying those things are bad, but that is what it sounds like. Like when you "settle down" you buy your house, pump out some kidlets and wait to die.....but I digress.
Ok, so at 13 I thought I would be 'chained' to all of those things. White picket fence, the dog, the kids, the whole shit-in-a-bag. Happy, right? Turns out that isn't what I wanted. I got married. I got divorced. I bought a house. I sold the house. I got a dog. He shits in the house....hmmm......I took in a homeless Mexican dog, what can I say?
So now I am thinking perhaps I should start a bucket list. Don't get me wrong, I love kids....but I still don't know if that whole package is for me. I can barely remember to feed my dog each day and sometimes I think he is passive aggressive about it.....is that possible?
So, here it is. I will begin my bucket list. Here on this blog.....where to start?
Tuesday, November 15, 2011
Focus! Focus! Focus!
Finding motivation this last week has NOT been easy. I've been reading the Hungry Runner Girl Blog, Making Goal Lists and catching up on my new Oxygen Magazine that came in the mail....but, tis the season. All I have wanted to do this week is put on some sweats and curl up with a good book. (I am currently reading "What's Your Number" HILARIOUS! Love me some chick lit.) Maybe eat some toast, or possibly some mac n cheese....or some more pancakes.....
Do you see this downward spiral?
I have my workouts and I have the tools, but I am lacking that extra *umph* of motivation this week. I thought it might help for me to list some of my to do's on here:
1) one hour of cardio every other day with a run on the off days 6 days a week
2) lifting 6 days a week in a 4 day rotation
3) eat every 3 hours clean proteins and carbs.....mmmmm carbs
4) I get a coffee every day....this is not negotiable....sorry Shane
OK, now that is out of the way. Let's discuss some other things. Things like one of my favorite new carbs.
PANCAKES!!!
I love them. Delicious. I have been making instant at home with all natural pancake mix, almond milk and water (you don't need the oil, just use water instead). You can even add ground flaxseed or protein powder....whatever you like!
I went with my padre a few weeks ago to Sage Cafe. It is a vegan restaurant dowtown that serves delicious homemade breakfasts on Saturdays and Sundays. We each had almond and apple pancakes with blueberry syrup.
YES! I took a bite and then remembered to take a picture....but look at how delicious they are! You can check out their menu at http://www.sagescafe.com/
Do you see this downward spiral?
I have my workouts and I have the tools, but I am lacking that extra *umph* of motivation this week. I thought it might help for me to list some of my to do's on here:
1) one hour of cardio every other day with a run on the off days 6 days a week
2) lifting 6 days a week in a 4 day rotation
3) eat every 3 hours clean proteins and carbs.....mmmmm carbs
4) I get a coffee every day....this is not negotiable....sorry Shane
OK, now that is out of the way. Let's discuss some other things. Things like one of my favorite new carbs.
PANCAKES!!!
I love them. Delicious. I have been making instant at home with all natural pancake mix, almond milk and water (you don't need the oil, just use water instead). You can even add ground flaxseed or protein powder....whatever you like!
I went with my padre a few weeks ago to Sage Cafe. It is a vegan restaurant dowtown that serves delicious homemade breakfasts on Saturdays and Sundays. We each had almond and apple pancakes with blueberry syrup.
YES! I took a bite and then remembered to take a picture....but look at how delicious they are! You can check out their menu at http://www.sagescafe.com/
Monday, November 14, 2011
I'm Allergic to Ugly....
"I hate ugliness. You know I'm allergic to ugliness" - Imelda Marcos
I had an interesting run in with ugliness last night. Ugly comes in all shapes and forms, but I think the worst is meanness and being judgmental.
My good friend called me crying after another friend of mine was mean to her. My heart sank. I wished I was with my friend on the phone so I could give her a hug and I also wish that I could hug the friend that was mean. They are both good and loving people. I think sometimes we use others as targets to make ourselves feel better when we don't know what else to do.
The older I get, the more I learn how little I know. It is easy to pass judgment. Easy to assume what you would do if you were in someone else's shoes. We are all guilty of it, whether it is intentional or not. My dad always tells me two things that “people generally do the best they can with what they know” and “it is important to love people for who they are, because most people really are good”. I think this is true.
What works for one, may not work for another. People are just people, after all. We are all just trying to figure this whole life thing out and it is inevitable that we will make mistakes along the way. Some mistakes hurt others, some just hurt us. This is just a part of life that each of us should accept. These choices we make are not ammunition we use to hurt others, especially not at the age of thirty.
When I was working on a spinal cord injury unit at the hospital, I took care of people with all different backgrounds. Gangsters, ex-convicts, illegal aliens, Christians, homosexuals, white supremist, etc. Literally I saw it all. No matter what the situation though, my dad's advice rang true. All of these people were good and loving and were just trying to do the best they could with what they knew. I have cried with a gang member and his mother. I have hugged a man when his boyfriend was dying. I have helped a Mexican with no insurance or social security number get better and find a home. I have prayed with a family when their daughter was sick. I have cried when an ex-convict who had become my good friend decided to die. All of these people were good. They have all made choices in life that have affected them positively and negatively. Who am I to judge?
Next time you think you know what is best for someone, next time you think you know how the world works....remind yourself that you don’t. No one knows. We are all just trying to do the best we can. Love people for who they are. It doesn't mean you should be everyone's best friend, but remember that hurtful words still hurt.
I had an interesting run in with ugliness last night. Ugly comes in all shapes and forms, but I think the worst is meanness and being judgmental.
My good friend called me crying after another friend of mine was mean to her. My heart sank. I wished I was with my friend on the phone so I could give her a hug and I also wish that I could hug the friend that was mean. They are both good and loving people. I think sometimes we use others as targets to make ourselves feel better when we don't know what else to do.
The older I get, the more I learn how little I know. It is easy to pass judgment. Easy to assume what you would do if you were in someone else's shoes. We are all guilty of it, whether it is intentional or not. My dad always tells me two things that “people generally do the best they can with what they know” and “it is important to love people for who they are, because most people really are good”. I think this is true.
What works for one, may not work for another. People are just people, after all. We are all just trying to figure this whole life thing out and it is inevitable that we will make mistakes along the way. Some mistakes hurt others, some just hurt us. This is just a part of life that each of us should accept. These choices we make are not ammunition we use to hurt others, especially not at the age of thirty.
When I was working on a spinal cord injury unit at the hospital, I took care of people with all different backgrounds. Gangsters, ex-convicts, illegal aliens, Christians, homosexuals, white supremist, etc. Literally I saw it all. No matter what the situation though, my dad's advice rang true. All of these people were good and loving and were just trying to do the best they could with what they knew. I have cried with a gang member and his mother. I have hugged a man when his boyfriend was dying. I have helped a Mexican with no insurance or social security number get better and find a home. I have prayed with a family when their daughter was sick. I have cried when an ex-convict who had become my good friend decided to die. All of these people were good. They have all made choices in life that have affected them positively and negatively. Who am I to judge?
Next time you think you know what is best for someone, next time you think you know how the world works....remind yourself that you don’t. No one knows. We are all just trying to do the best we can. Love people for who they are. It doesn't mean you should be everyone's best friend, but remember that hurtful words still hurt.
Sunday, November 13, 2011
Giving Thanks....
What a year! I know it has been some time since I blogged. Since the competition that I missed on October 8th, some funky things have gone on in my life.
2 days before the NGA competition I woke up with my right eye swollen shut. BAH! I went to the doctor and they determined that it was seasonal allergies. The doc said that even my sclera (the white part of my eyeball) was swollen. They gave me allergy eye drops and benadryl. I couldn't compete for a few reasons.
1) The NGA does not give out Quasimoto look-alike awards (if they had, I would've nailed it)
2) I can't walk in my back pose on stage the entire time
3) I couldn't wear my contacts and I literally can see about 6 inches in front of my face....me + heels + stage + posing + blindness = fall on my ass
4) They won't let you wear bedazzled eye patches
*sigh*
So, no comp for me. I figured 'That's ok! I will be better in a week and start training for next year!'......
Since then, my eyes have become swollen 2 more times. This last Tuesday I woke up with both of them swollen. I was blind. Chris had to drive me to the eye specialist where the doc told me "They look angry and beat up, no contacts for 3 to 6 months." They gave me a steroid to take and I go back in on Tuesday. Between that, my comp and my Raynauds I have been feeling pretty beat down by life recently.
Over this past week I missed two days of work because I was unable to stare at a computer screen, my eyes are photosensitive. Without being able to look at a computer or a television and without being able to drive, I had a lot of time to reflect. I cried a lot, I ate a shit ton of pancakes (yes, I am PMSing) and when I was done I started thinking about how much worse things could be.
So my eyes are mad at me. Ok, I will take care of them. My hands hurt sometimes and my feet as well which make it difficult to be in the cold....I will just keep trying. The vegan thing doesn't really suck at all anymore and I can continue to do it and it has truly helped me.
When I was little, my mom used to tell my brothers and I several Mexican 'words of wisdom'. A lot of them have stuck, but when I was reflecting on the attitude I choose one in particular comes to mind:
Always be thankful for what you have, because no matter how tough things are for you someone always has it worse.
Mami may be a little loco, but she was right. I have a loving family. I have loving friends. My immune system might be 'on the fritz', but overall I still have my health. I have food (sometimes too much). I have a roof. I have a warm bed. I have my sanity (most days). I can have carbs (thank you, thank you!). I have my whole life to live still and figure this shit out. By Thursday I had come to the conclusion that my autoimmune-allergy-for-the-love-of-humanity stricken body could eat a bag of dicks and go fuck itself. If there is anything I have learned being a nurse, I know that things could always be worse and the mind is the most powerful thing we have.
So, this November I am giving thanks. Thank you for the challenges in my life, without these I would not be who I am. They make me stronger. Thank you to my patients, family and friends. You help me stay focused. Thank you to my mother for helping me stay grounded, always. XoXo
2 days before the NGA competition I woke up with my right eye swollen shut. BAH! I went to the doctor and they determined that it was seasonal allergies. The doc said that even my sclera (the white part of my eyeball) was swollen. They gave me allergy eye drops and benadryl. I couldn't compete for a few reasons.
1) The NGA does not give out Quasimoto look-alike awards (if they had, I would've nailed it)
2) I can't walk in my back pose on stage the entire time
3) I couldn't wear my contacts and I literally can see about 6 inches in front of my face....me + heels + stage + posing + blindness = fall on my ass
4) They won't let you wear bedazzled eye patches
*sigh*
So, no comp for me. I figured 'That's ok! I will be better in a week and start training for next year!'......
Since then, my eyes have become swollen 2 more times. This last Tuesday I woke up with both of them swollen. I was blind. Chris had to drive me to the eye specialist where the doc told me "They look angry and beat up, no contacts for 3 to 6 months." They gave me a steroid to take and I go back in on Tuesday. Between that, my comp and my Raynauds I have been feeling pretty beat down by life recently.
Over this past week I missed two days of work because I was unable to stare at a computer screen, my eyes are photosensitive. Without being able to look at a computer or a television and without being able to drive, I had a lot of time to reflect. I cried a lot, I ate a shit ton of pancakes (yes, I am PMSing) and when I was done I started thinking about how much worse things could be.
So my eyes are mad at me. Ok, I will take care of them. My hands hurt sometimes and my feet as well which make it difficult to be in the cold....I will just keep trying. The vegan thing doesn't really suck at all anymore and I can continue to do it and it has truly helped me.
When I was little, my mom used to tell my brothers and I several Mexican 'words of wisdom'. A lot of them have stuck, but when I was reflecting on the attitude I choose one in particular comes to mind:
Always be thankful for what you have, because no matter how tough things are for you someone always has it worse.
Mami may be a little loco, but she was right. I have a loving family. I have loving friends. My immune system might be 'on the fritz', but overall I still have my health. I have food (sometimes too much). I have a roof. I have a warm bed. I have my sanity (most days). I can have carbs (thank you, thank you!). I have my whole life to live still and figure this shit out. By Thursday I had come to the conclusion that my autoimmune-allergy-for-the-love-of-humanity stricken body could eat a bag of dicks and go fuck itself. If there is anything I have learned being a nurse, I know that things could always be worse and the mind is the most powerful thing we have.
So, this November I am giving thanks. Thank you for the challenges in my life, without these I would not be who I am. They make me stronger. Thank you to my patients, family and friends. You help me stay focused. Thank you to my mother for helping me stay grounded, always. XoXo
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